This little note is for my family. Hopefully it will be of some use, and I hope may  be
                     some comfort to them, for the present,and into the foreseeable future

I have for at least the past year or so, noticed a distinct deterioration in the workings of my brain. Actually now that I give it some thought I believe I started to notice little things about a year before I was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer in Oct. 2007.

Where at one time as an air traffic controller I could keep track of several things at once, and did have
virtually total recall, I now at times have great difficulty remembering what is right in front of me.

 A perfect example of this was the other day, Beth and I were at the store when I found a cute picture frame and called to her to tell her we should buy this ????? - I could not for the life of me remember the word 'picture frame'. So since I did not say another word, we of course did not buy the frame.

This is very disturbing.

I know you may say, "we all have examples of not being able to remember little things from time to time", and I agree, but this I believe is much more serious.

We went to visit an old friend today who is suffering from a rather advanced form of dementia, it was a very sobering, and yes in fact scary experience. Our friend has lost his strength, and his memory for  many experiences is poor, he does not know where the washroom  is in his home, etc etc.

However he is very aware of his situation, knows he is going downhill rapidly, yes and he still can make jokes about his condition.

I believe the above sentence is extremely important for friends and love ones to remember. That person locked inside hers or his prison is still that same person. At times they can, and will make it very clear indeed, that they are still there, but always remember even when they cannot make it clear
                                       THEY ARE STILL THERE

As for me, I have no idea of how fast or indeed how severe my brain is going to degenerate.
However if it becomes a severe problem for Beth and the family, I just want you all to know, even if at the time I may not be able to express the words, I will always trust you to do the proper thing for all concerned, which I know would include me. 
                   Great Grampa
                                           And Friend


  1. Hey, there are tests that can be done to see if you have signs of dementia I think, and thinks that can be done to slow the process. You should go see your doctor and see what can be done.

  2. i agree! go and see the doc see what they have to say. I know not always do we want to see a doctor but at least it might help with understanding it a bit better and what not. I agree with you 100% just because you age and things happen to the body and mind doesnt mean your any different then when you were not experiencing these things. I think you should be treated the same. and i also think its great that you can recognize that. Some people become very annoyed or embarrassed and then it makes it difficult for all members involved. But you know what its life and its this life we all have right now. Your body is only the vessel and you are here on a temporary visa card! I love your way of writing! thank you for sharing this blog. I will keep it posted on the computer next to Gramma Beth. Look forward to more posts.

  3. Thanks Craig and Shandel for the thoughtful, and kind comments - I do appreciate it.

  4. Very thoughtful Dad. I will remember what you said.


  5. I think it is easy to forget the human inside when the illness becomes the most obvious thing we see in a person. Personally for me, watching how you and mom treat others in these situations is what will be my guidance. Not that I will hope to ever live up to your level of compassion, but I certainly will try. Maybe we should bet a button made up you can wear, "I am still here" Sandra

  6. Good idea Sandra - you are doing fine!


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